Rayven's Nest-40k to 1st poster on pg. 400!
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Saiyouri
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Sat May 09, 2020 11:24 am
Rayven- A lesson I could of gone without. I knew tall grass was a no no as a kid, but since I was a few feet at least away from it, I figured I'd be ok... I was so wrong with that.

We got snow.... I'm not sure I fully understand anything anymore. I need to give up. It's best that way with whatever is going on with whatever seasons it is.

I hope they are ok.

Tam- Lucky!


Well I figured that my brain is something I need to try to control again. Seeing things in the news is making me think more and more of talks with my son and I'm starting to wonder more and more how far my son is under his fathers beliefs. I know the older someone gets they form their own beliefs and that but the way my son seems to be getting isn't who he ever was growing up and not how I raised him. And I know that since we don't talk too often; constantly thinking of these things isn't healthy and fair to hubs and the kitties. So I need to try to figure out how to stop my brain from having a mind of it's own. Though I did tell hubs that since Mother's Day is tomorrow; if I don't hear from him around the day or hear he said something to his father's wife, I'd know how far he's under his control in a sense and it might get to the point I have to talk to him about it (even though I'm risking losing a relationship with him and I don't want that).

Ugh it's hard knowing your kid is better than something and can't do anything about it. And having that close of a relationship with my son makes things even harder to deal with and figure out. Hubs told me it might be where I don't have a relationship with my son cause he understands more what a abuse victim brain is like. Something I've tried to get him to understand. Which is why he said he won't believe my daughter is doing better until she actually moves out. I need to find something to suck my brain completely so I stop thinking. Sorry for the sad post. >.>
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Riley
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Sun May 10, 2020 1:56 pm
*waves* Hello everyone Very Happy

Hope all is well with you.

I'm very proud of myself. XD I mustered up enough willpower and energy to go to the gardening store yesterday and bought a ton of flowers. All of the dead plants on the porch have been removed and nice, colorful things have now been planted. Operation "fix up the porch" is in motion. Very Happy
Rayven
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Tue May 12, 2020 1:22 pm
UtterlyWeird wrote:
I'm so glad I live where I live. No ticks, no fleas. No chiggers. YAS.




Wow! Shocked You're lucky, Tam. Very Happy We don't have it too bad. The ticks were bad when we first moved here in 1984 but Dad sprayed some stuff he probably shouldn't have because it was pretty strong and got rid of them. XD We battled fleas for years but we finally have them under control. I've never experienced chiggers. That I know of. XD







Saiyouri-XD Grass is a no no for me too but for a different reason. If I sit, lay, or whatever in the grass my skin breaks out and itches. :/

Shocked You poor thing. We've had some rain but no snow. I enjoyed the snow this winter but I don't want anymore now. XD

Thanks. We'll just have to wait and see if they grow. *is hopeful*








Riley-*glomps Riley* Hi, hi! Very Happy It's good to see you.

I think we're basically doing ok here. XD

That's awesome! Very Happy We've been doing a lot of yard work here too. Your porch must be lovely now. Very Happy
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Tue May 12, 2020 10:25 pm
Ive been so MIA I feel bad. :[
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Rayven
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Tue May 12, 2020 10:39 pm
Don't be silly. *pokes Boo* XD

How are things going for you? Have your parents drove you nuts yet? LOL
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Saiyouri
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Wed May 13, 2020 11:41 am
Hi Riley. Congrats on the gardening.

Rayven- Ouchy. I never met someone before who was allergic to grass.

I think I'm too hopeful when it comes to my kids. I let my worry for the consume me and I know it's not healthy if it's affecting my life and sleep but its something I can't help. Wished I could though.

>.>

We bought a hand held sewing machine and just got a response from the amazon seller saying they lost the shipment so they will resend it. Now hubs and I have to figure out what to do. Figured one of those would make it easier to make face masks for hubs instead of trying to hand sew them all. Ugh thinking, not something I want to do at the moment. I do enough of it lol.

Hi Boo. It's ok. *hugs*


Oh just remembered, we are supposed to get two 80 days then a 78... I call bull big time. If those days happen, then I think the world is ending considering we still have a freeze warning.... I think the weather needs severe help right now before it breaks itself.
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Rayven
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Wed May 13, 2020 8:02 pm
I guess it's the grass but it could be some weed I guess.

I used to do that until my son's life got so bad I knew there was nothing at all that I could do. I just kind of gave up at that point. Worrying doesn't help but it's hard not to do it.

Sorry to hear you have to wait longer to get it. We've got some things ordered that are taking forever to get here too.

Spring is bipolar. XD
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UtterlyWeird
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Wed May 13, 2020 9:58 pm
Spring is abnormally windy and warm, here.

And I am abnormally wiped out. I feel like road kill.

**waves to Riley** Flowers, yaaaas.
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Rayven
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Thu May 14, 2020 8:52 am
Tam-Good for you. We've been chilly and rainy. On the plus side, that is normal for us. The last few years weren't normal. We got an early summer the last few years. We're supposed to warm up this week. I hope the rain stops too. I gots planting to do. XD

Speaking of which, Mom and I bought quite a few flowers yesterday but it was raining so we couldn't plant any. We also had to get a few groceries so we made two trips into the store. I think the door greeter thought we were crazy. XD

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling rough. I didn't feel the best yesterday evening. I was overly tired for some reason.
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Saiyouri
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Thu May 14, 2020 11:35 am
Rayven- I don't mind waiting for things, it's just when the people don't answer you when you ask for tracking and then when they finally do, it's lost. Not something I want to deal with. Hubs has no tracking for the new shipment but trying to talk to him about it didn't go too well. I think he might of been too preoccupied. I should really try again to figure out what to do. Would be nice to get this stuff taken care of.

I think I might of figured out one way to help with not worrying or stressing as much with my kids. I'm a massive pushover. I'm aware I'm a doormat. Hubs says he doesn't see it that way, but he could be too nice. I figured that if hubs tries to say something while I'm on the phone, I say "what did you say?" to acknowledge him more instead of more than just ignoring him. And if he wants to do something or I have to do something, I say it instead of waiting for my kid to finish the call. I always put others first and that's not good when it comes to stress.

Figured that if I get the doormat part worked on, maybe I can get to the point of figuring out a way to tell my daughter that talking about something her father did for 3 days in a row like she recently did, is something I don't want to do. After 3 days of talking about something he did, I had a bad dream of him and thought hubs was him... again. I'm aware that healing from the past will take time, but I don't want somethings to happen. I want to control the PTSD part as best as I can so it doesn't make things harder for hubs and me than it already has at times. It's not a big start, but for me it's huge and I'm hoping it works. I just need to remember it and actually do it. I did start to not care about what I say about him. I started to notice that I defend him less talking to my daughter (which is a big no no for sure). >.>


When I get more wiped out it's usually the temp changes that are doing it. Not sure if that could be something for you two. Ugh, those 80days are not going to be fun. I figured I feel sick but ... I might get wiped out badly and I didn't think of that until now. Woot temps are fun!
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UtterlyWeird
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Fri May 15, 2020 12:04 am
I had a weird dream last night. I live alone. I like it. But last night I woke up from a dream of being in a bedroom full of siblings, and felt disoriented and afraid at being alone.

On a happier note. I'm getting a new doll kid. https://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/715646646/echeveria-a-3d-printed-micro-ball-joint Plant baby! Mine's going to be purple, with brown eyes.
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Saiyouri
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Fri May 15, 2020 11:09 am
*hugs* Sorry to hear that Tam. I hope you felt better soon after you woke up.

She's cute. Nice looking doll for sure.
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Rayven
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Fri May 15, 2020 6:59 pm
Saiyouri-I don't blame you for that.

No, it's not. I did that to myself for years and it nearly drove me insane. I'll never be perfect about it but I do work on being more assertive.

You should just tell her. Hopefully, she'll listen. Do you think she would?

You might be right. It was warmer that day I think. It doesn't help that I haven't slept well for 3 days. Last night I woke up at 3:30 AM because of my carpal tunnel.










Tam-I can see how that dream would bother you. *hugs*

Oh my goodness! That is an adorable doll. Congrats! Very Happy
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Saiyouri
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Sat May 16, 2020 1:37 pm
Well hubs and I told her once that talking about her father gets to me. It worked for awhile but then she started it back up again. So we both know that she needs a place to vent.

I did tell her bluntly two days ago that she should worry about herself on her wedding day. She's spoken of it even though her and her boyfriend aren't engaged yet. I told her only invite people who won't chance causing something. And that means not her father, and I don't mind going (I know it's the worse idea ever.). She said his family would start to harass her over it and then call him. And I told her that people seem to think that when it comes to a wedding people who attend it think it's their day and not the people actually getting married. So then I said only invite her boyfriend's family and her closest friends. No family. Especially considering who her family really is.

I know she might want her parents there (even though majority of the time she can't stand her father and knows her step brother and sister's future will be full of abuse the older they get); but if things could get bad, then those people shouldn't attend it. I know me going will really upset his entire family since they believe the lies he told them of me, my own mother would try something with me there; so me not going is the smartest choice ever. And I can guarantee even with me not there my mom and her father will do something to ruin the day in some way.

Just wished she listen to me about this. I'm trying to help her understand that her day in the future is about her and her boyfriend and no one else and no conflict is the best option for them. And I know this will take a long time to get through to her.

I wished she'd listen but she partially does at times. She's slowly kinda-ish getting there. So that's something at least.


Ouch waking up for that, I didn't even know you could wake up to carpal tunnel acting up, though it does make sense. My mom had that when I was growing up and those days it acted up she wasn't exactly the nicest person in the world. >.> I hope there is a way you can help ease the pain so you can sleep.

I so hate this heat. Well it's not really the heat right now, it's the humidity that's really driving me nuts.
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Rayven
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Sun May 17, 2020 4:50 pm
At least it doesn't sound like she's doing it on purpose.

That's a good idea. Or they could elope! Very Happy

Probably but I'm afraid you might regret not going. You only get to see your daughter married once. Hopefully only once. XD

The older she gets, the more she'll listen. It takes kids a long time to realize that their parents aren't dumb. LOL

Yeah, it gets so numb it hurts. It takes moving around for a bit to make it stop, hard to sleep through that. XD At least the pain stopped when I got up. It rarely gets that bad unless I do a lot with my hands. I used a staple gun a lot that day.

Awww. Humidity is rough stuff. We're still getting a ton of rain so our temp is good and not much humidity yet.
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