Do Soulmates exist?
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Do soulmates exist
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Sun Aug 26, 2012 1:49 am
1. Do soulmates actually exist?
I think so, yes.
2. Is there only one person for everyone?
No. Because your opinion and your personality and taste changes every day, so does the idea of your soulmate.
3. Have you met your soulmate?
No, but I feel like that if, and hopefully when, I do, I'll just know. No questioning required.
4. Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?
I think you find your soulmate when you least expect it. It seems like finding one would be a million times harder if you kept looking. Who knows? Maybe your soulmate has been by your side all this time.
5. How do you know when you found your soulmate?
I'm probably just a hopeless romantic, but should I find my soulmate, I'd want to just know. It's a gut instinct - those things and ideas and people that can't be questioned.
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Fri Aug 31, 2012 11:58 pm
I'd better start by stating that the soul doesn't exist, and therefore, the word 'soulmate' sounds just as fantastic to me. I'll continue to play along anyway and use the word, but I'll suppose it refers to a person who is exactly perfect for another.

Do soulmates actually exist?
I would venture to say they don't exist for everyone, but they could exist for one person. A friend and I were talking about love and attraction, and she helped me devise a beautiful analogy, which I will now share with you, since it's relevant. Think of each person as a large display of lights, say a 1,000 by 1,000 square for example. Each light might represent an attribute of their character, and it is either on or off. If each configuration is created randomly, it is very, very unlikely that any two will line up perfectly, but since the number of lights a person has must be finite (even if 1,000 by 1,000 is an oversimplification, which is likely), it's theoretically possible to find a perfect match, in other words, a 'soulmate'.

On a somewhat related note, my friend and I were using this analogy in terms of open relationships. If you open yourself up to the possibility of multiple partners, you greatly increase your odds of finding a configuration of lights which, combined, manages to satisfy yours.

Is there only one person for everyone?
It's possible, though even more extremely unlikely, that three different people could all be perfect matches for each other.

Have you met your soulmate?
No. I am currently dating one of the two closest matches I have ever met. The other one I am still in close contact with against my current partner's wishes, and I never want to let him go.

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?
I don't think I'll ever find someone better suited for me than the two I have already found. Finding others would only complicate this more (so I have noticed).

How do you know when you found your soulmate?
Good question. I really, really don't think it's an instantaneous thing like some other people are suggesting; you don't 'just know'. If you run into someone randomly and immediately think you've fallen in love with him, if you were to stick around, you'd probably get to know him later on and find something you don't love about him. But if you've been with the same person for years and it's been perfect the whole time... yeah, it's possible he might be your perfect match. ^^
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Thu Dec 27, 2012 7:38 am
Here's a little thing I was reading.
I think the ending quote pretty much sums everything up o:

While reading Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, I read a section that I totally bookmarked and wanted to share with all of you.

(While trying to learn the art of meditation, the main "character," Liz, finds that she cannot get her ex-boyfriend out of her head. The following conversation is held between her and her friend Richard.)

"'I'm not laughing.' I was actually crying. 'And please don't laugh at me now, but I think the reason it's so hard for me to get over this guy is because I seriously believe David was my soul mate.'

'He probably was, [Richard said]. Your problem is you don't understand what that word means. People think a true soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave. And thank God for it.'"

A Thousand Dreams
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Thu Dec 27, 2012 8:31 am
Do soul mates actually exist?

I'm actually more in line with Aurelia's definition of "Soul mate" -- That it has more to do with compatibility of attributes than anything else. I, moreover, do not restrict that to romantic connections.

So with that understanding in mind, yes, I believe soul mates (and soul friends!) are possible.

Is there only one person for everyone?

Pfft, heck no. I don't believe in the "only one soul mate" idea. It makes absolutely no sense, especially since we are constantly changing over the course of our lives -- From that perspective alone, the notion of one soul mate is impossible. (I guess that's why I don't like that title, "soul mate". I feel as strongly about some of my friends as I do about my husband, but for different reasons, and I need them all to make my life manageable... Razz )

I have many soul connections, all of whom fulfill different functions, and all of whom hold a very important and special place in my life.

I have only ever had one husband though, and I have no intention of leaving him, or sharing that particular aspect of my life or myself with anyone else but him. Having made that decision, anyone who might have fit as potential soul mates are immediately placed into the soul friend category.

Have you meant your soul mate?

Yes, I've met several of them and I hold them all dear.

I also recognize that the "soul mate/friend process" is the same as any other -- It requires a lot of diligence and work from both parties to maintain the connection. That is as true for spousal soul mates as it is for soul friends. But because of the compatibilities that got you there to begin with, in theory, it should be inherently easier to maintain.

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?

Well, since I don't believe in the single soul mate, there's nothing to give up on. I meet them at the most unexpected moments, someone I just suddenly make a strong connection with and that I can both teach and learn from. And the "shock of recognition" you get when you meet someone so compatible is always amazing. So why would I ever stop looking and deprive myself of that? XD

How do you know when you found your soul mate?

Hmm, I don't know how it is for anyone else, but for me it's a sense of utter conviction that, for this little while anyways, these people are absolutely invaluable to me. I look forward to every meeting and just thoroughly enjoy their company. ^___^

Again, though, these are not guarantees to eternal connections. Humans are too variable to make that possible without work.

Any interesting stories I would love to hear them!!

Well, I went to pick up my best friend at her school one day and, while I as outside waiting for her to finish her class, I kept getting his strange feeling I was being watched. After a while, I realized it was coming from one of the 4th story windows... it was one of her friends whom I'd just met.

The sensation was acute. He may as well have been standing behind me, poking me in the back and saying "Look over this way", it was so tangible.

And I've been married to that man for 14 years now. ^___^

This is not to say we haven't had our difficult times. It's been, at moments, very bumpy. But I've learned that you really do have to work at the things that matter to you. ANY soul connection will only last as long as you're taking care of it.


Last edited by Tisiel on Sat Aug 17, 2013 1:09 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Sat Dec 29, 2012 12:13 am
Do soulmates actually exist?
Yes, I do believe they exist. I also agree with Tisiel's idea of soul friends. Smile

Is there only one person for everyone?
That's hard to say for me....but that's only since I've only met one soul mate. I prefer not to open up to too many people. But I don't like denying things based only on my own experience, so I think it's very well possible to find several soul mates.

Have you meant your soulmate?
Yes. Wink

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?
I never even searched in the first place....and yet I found my soul mate in the most unlikely place. (see below for story)

How do you know when you found your soulmate?
It just feels right. I'm very uncomfortable with most people, mostly because it's painfully apparent to me that something about me just doesn't fit in this world and "normal" relationships - with my soul mate, I can just be myself without feeling awkward, and I can say and do the weirdest things and be sure he understands me.

Any interesting stories I would love to hear them!!
How a series of strange coincidences helped me find my soul mate Very Happy

A few years ago, when I played Ragnarok Online, there was a small guild on the European server that decided to try out RP events. I was curious and joined, and loved it. Not many people were interested though, but I still joined the guild anyway. There was one person who loved our events, and decided to host RP events of his own (that were a little different than ours; we mostly did small standalone events while his had a basic storyline behind them). At that time, I didn't really like the game itself anymore and those events were the only reason why I didn't quit Smile

After one of those events, our characters ended up talking about random stuff when someone asked how many children we wanted... It was meant to be a joke, but somehow I couldn't stop thinking about it and I sent a letter from my character to him (note: my characters have a strange habit of deciding things on their own), asking him to meet again. He agreed, and that was the beginning of our regular RPG evenings (including marriage, a child, lots of other characters and a storyline that pretty much screws up everything about the game XD )

Eventually we talked a lot about ourselves as well, and he became my best friend. In fact, he was one of only two people I trusted. I was horribly afraid of people at that time, to the point of getting panic attacks when I was in a room with too many other people. He was the only one who truly understood my feelings. And we realized whe had a lot in common (even minor things such as getting sick easily when it's too hot outside).

Now I'm a person who isn't interested in love at all. I had never fallen in love with anyone, I wasn't even slightly interested in men. Not even women, other than noticing how attractive my cousin's wife was. xD I just didn't get the whole 'dating' thing (and still don't). I'm just not able to have feelings for someone I don't know well enough, and when I do, they're great friends, but nothing else. Love in general just seemed worse than friendship to me.

Anyway, we had known each other for over two years when I agreed to meet him (and our ingame daughter). I never even thought about falling in love with him, but that was what happened. It took me a few months until I realized it, and another few until I could bring myself to tell him. Our friendship was the only thing in my life that could still make me feel happy, and I didn't want to destroy or even damage it. He told me he wasn't sure about his feelings for me, and asked me to meet again so he could find out. Which was pretty difficult because he was still going to school, we both didn't have much money and don't even live in the same country. So it was almost another year until I saw him again. Long story short, we didn't even need to talk. We just somehow knew we were meant to be together.

Other than my family, he's the first and probably the only person I ever loved. He's worth all the effort put in a long-distance relationship (and that's coming from someone who is still not interested in relationships in general). If it's not forever, I'm not going to look for someone else. He's a truly wonderful person, and it's strange to think I wouldn't have met him if I hadn't randomly decided to join an event in a game. Very Happy


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Sat Dec 29, 2012 1:29 am
Do soulmates actually exist?

Yes they do.

Is there only one person for everyone?

I don't think this is true though. I believe we can be happy with more than one person. Especially if we can not be with our soul mate.

Have you meant your soulmate?

I have. I'm not currently with him which is very painful for me.

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?

Well if I hadn't already found him I would definitely be crazy enough to never give up. XD

How do you know when you found your soulmate?

I'm not sure I can explain it. I will tell you though that not being with them is like not being able to breathe. They are all you think about, dream about, etc.

Any interesting stories I would love to hear them!!

I met my soul mate when I was very young. We started going out when I was 12, and he was 13. We were very close for a couple of years. Then I made some really dumb decisions, and lost him. We did continue to see each other off and on for about 15 years. The funny thing is I truly believe you can be connected to your soul mate even if you are apart. Sometimes I would think about him so strongly it was almost as if I could feel him. And it wouldn't be long, and I would hear from him. He has told me the same thing. Currently we are both married to other people. I can only hope one day when the time is right we will be together again.
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Sat Dec 29, 2012 1:57 am
Do soulmates actually exist?
Loosely and intermittently somewhat maybe.

Is there only one person for everyone?
I've heard there are 11 soulmates per state.

Have you meant your soulmate?
I've met people I have really connected with which likely meet the typical definition. One would be my husband.

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?

How do you know when you found your soulmate?
Maybe you know and maybe you don't. I think the word is malleable to the situation which is malleable to the persons involved which is malleable to the timing and so forth.
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Sun Dec 30, 2012 3:09 am
Do soulmates actually exist?
well I like to think that they do. I sometimes think that it might take many lifetimes for them to truly find each other.

Is there only one person for everyone?

I would think there would be only one true soul mate, But I believe that till you find him or her. there are others out there that will compliment your soul and make you very happy.

Have you meant your soulmate?

I can honestly say no I have not. and I really don't see it happening anytime soon

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?

Oh now one should never stop searching for ones soulmate. Though from what I have heard many of them sneak up on you when you are not even looking for them!

How do you know when you found your soulmate?

Intersting question, well since I have yet to find mine I can not truly answer this one, tell you what, I will let you know when it happens...I think sometimes that one just knows it, but doesn't know how they know it.

Any interesting stories I would love to hear them!!

well no, no interesting stories, but as I was writing this i started to think, wouldn't it be interesting if soul mates where like shattered pieces of glass..(think inyuasha and the shards).. and that each life time was spent finding each other, each time a little piece of their soul was connected. maybe that is why some people would feel they have more than one soul mate. each life making their souls bigger and bigger till they finally become one...

shrugs and smiles just a thought.
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Tue Jan 01, 2013 10:00 pm
i thought i had found my soulmate whenever i was 18 but, he didn't feel the same way as i did. he knocked me up & left. haven't heard from or seen him since the day i told him i was pregnant. that child is now almost 28. what a shame he will never know her or her 2 sons. there is a soulmate out there for everyone i believe.
proud member of the spork squad!
]don't make me poke you with this spork! LOL
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Thu Jul 25, 2013 3:58 am
I honestly don't know. I want to believe that soulmates can exist, but I'm asexual so I don't know what that would mean for me.

If they do exist, you would have to be pretty lucky to find yours. Of all the people who are alive, the chances of finding your true other half in more than 6 billion people is rather slim. Amd that's if you are born in relatively the same time period. It could be that your soulmate will have come and gone long before your birth, or won't be born for hundreds of years yet. Let's not even get into the idea of life and love on other planets, because extra-terrestrial soul mates are pretty dang hard to believe, even by the open minded.

If soulmates do exist, I sincerly hope they are arranged so they mates live at least on the same continent, and are born hopefully in the same generation. Otherwise finding your mate would be like trying to win the lottery every day forever.
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Tue Jul 30, 2013 4:23 am
Do soul mates actually exist?
To a particular degree.
I also believe that they don't necessarily need to be romantically attracted.

Is there only one person for everyone?
I believe that more than one person can be meant for another.
It's a complicated thought.

Have you met your soul mate?
Mates, I think so.
My best friend, who lives on the other side of the country now.
We grew up in similar living situations, and yet were completely different at the same time.
We just seem to have this unbreakable bond.
She has been my best friend for...about 7 years now, nearly two of which she has been gone.
Even though I cannot see her as often as I once was able to, we are still thick as thieves.

...annnddd Boyfriend.
Next month will be our one year anniversary, and I'm so ridiculously excited.
I've been living with him at his parents house since last September, essentially, and we have yet to become tired of each other.
Even though we often become irritated with one another. :p
Regardless, if we have the chance, we are side-by-side.
We have this weird unspoken understanding of each other.
Sometimes, I just randomly start crying and he'll start cuddling me and telling me everything's going to be alright. (-gag reflex engage-)
He puts up with a lot of my crap, and it absolutely amazes me.
We just seem to understand each other no matter the situation.
We've never had a legitimate couple fight.
We may argue, but it never goes further than that.
Needless to say, as far as I can see, neither of us are going anywhere.
And even if something did happen, I think we would still have to be in each other's lives.
It sounds so childish, but it just feels that way.

Are you crazy enough to never give up and stop searching?
Seeing as how I'm perfectly content with the people I believe to be my "soul mates", why would I keep looking? XD

How do you know when you found your soul mate?
I just feel like your "soul mate" is a person who understands everything you have done and will do, and every perspective of who you are.
And they accept you in all of it.
Like I said earlier, said person does not necessarily need to be somebody (or some people) that you are romantically attracted to.
I think that you'll just...know.
You may find them and it may take years for you to realize it, but it'll hit you eventually.
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Sat Aug 17, 2013 5:44 am
I believe so.

I met a guy on the internet in a game that we both play and for some reason, even though he was just text, I felt very drawn to the guy. His character was married at the time, so I kept at a friend-only zone with him but I longed for the day he would be single so that I may try to woo his heart.

We did talk on and off for the next 3 or 4 years outside the game and we lost touch for about a year or two. At that time, I ended up meeting someone and got married and we had a child together. Then I ended up returning to the game. I noticed his character was no longer married, however, his character was involved with another lady. I loved my husband IRL, but my character was so compelled by his character, that I just wish his lady were me instead.

Eventually his woman did split up with him and he was saddened and was about to quit game. I went to the woman, who was also my best friend and my character confessed her feelings for her ex. She urged me to go forward and let him know and so my character finally did. Our characters got married.

Meanwhile, my husband IRL and I were having some personal issues. One (there were a LOT, but just naming this one for this story) was that he didn't like me talking to other guys over the phone. This guy was my friend for over 5 years.. I knew him LONG before I did my husband. I always hated when people tell me to either be friends with him and lose me or stop being friends with him and keep me. That shows lack of trust and I didn't like how my own husband didn't trust me that I wasn't being involved with anyone but my husband. He knew about my other character's marriage with another friend of mine, but for some reason he just targeted this specific friend of mine..

My friend did try to help me through all the tough times and attempted to try to save my marriage, but the lack of trust continued and so I finally started ignoring my friend to show my own husband that there was nothing going on between my friend and I. Even though my own sister told me that I seemed much happier when talking to my friend as opposed to my own husband. I often thought am I really in love with someone else? But I loved my husband and I still do.

Finally things just never worked for the better and we divorced. I called my friend in tears, apologizing profusely to him and explained why I ignored him and I hoped he would forgive me. He understood completely and he helped me through all the emotions of my divorce.

There were a few times that I did verbally attack him due to all the stress but he practically slapped me across the face and put me in my place. We continued to talk and I started to fall in love with him... My sister was right. I was truly happy when I talked to my friend and I feel terrible for being in love with another man when I was married, but I never acted upon those feelings because I loved my husband.

My friend eventually wanted to meet me and I figured why not. So, I told him he could come visit. While he was getting set up to come visit, I got scared. I nearly called it off because I didn't want people to think I was cheating on my husband with the very guy I was accused of cheating on with (even tho he was a state away, not sure how that's possible, but okay!). Then I finally told myself who gives a shi** what other people think... You have every right to be happy and if you fell in love with your best friend who helped you through emotional times, then that's no one elses business.

When he came to visit, things went wonderfully. I didn't want to let him go when he had to return home, but it was the most amazing 2 weeks.

Then it dawned on me afterwards... I remember asking him one year why he didn't date when he was talking about how lonely in a certain room he was.. He told me he didn't want to date a girl because he didn't want a girl who was only after money.
For him to actually call me his girlfriend made me grin. I felt very special and at the same time honored.

I actually believe that he actually waited for me all these years. And I'm so happy he did. He's my other half.

My daughter loves him. My family loves him. And I love him so very much.

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Sun Mar 30, 2014 7:08 pm
I believe in soulmates of all types - romantic and non-romantic. I'd like to think that my romantic soulmate and I have found one another too.
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